Marcom Wishlist for 2010

1. That telecallers stop parroting "Is there anything else I may assist you with?" to conclude the call
   "Do you need any other help?" is shorter, sweeter and makes me feel I'm talking to a Homo Sapien.
    
2. That the same telecallers cut out the "Thank you for calling Abracadabra Magic services" part
   I know who I have called. Just end on a happy note and let me get on with life.
    
3. That the word "promotion" be banned from all Marcom material
   It's promotion for the company/brand. For me--the customer--it could be an offer, a deal or some such, but not a promotion.
    
4. That the term "Presenting Sponsor" appear only in sponsorship brochures and presentations
   For the man on the street, "Pahalwan Body Oil presents Kushti Kishton Mein" is more intelligible. If you do need a descriptor, use "Brought to you by" or "Presented by" but not "Presenting Sponsor". It's your internal lingo, please don't unleash it on me, the aam aadmi.
    
5. That TV and radio shows stop the breathless muttering of taglines along with the sponsor brands
   "Brought to you by Locomotive Mustard Oil--Har boond mein train ki shakti, in association with Balramgarh Shakkar - Live life with sugary sweetness" is like forcing the taglines down my throat and that ain't sweet.
    
6. That contractual service brands save the best offers for their existing customers...
   and not make them feel cheated by offering new customers the same service at 50% "promotional" discount while the trapped ones continue to pay a premium for being loyal.
   [Hint: Think home loans, pest control services, club memberships...]

I know the last point is not within the purview of Marcom, but what the heck, this is a wishlist, right?

Have a great 2010.

Mustache Magic

Many many years ago, a certain mustachioed gentleman changed the way Fevicol went about advertising its white adhesive. Last week, the brand celebrated 50 years of adhesiveness. The mustachioed gentleman and his cohorts (all mustachioed of course, but without the trademark handlebar) came up with this:

This is the latest in the series of brilliant commercials for Fevicol which have stuck around for over two decades. It all started with an ad for a different brand. The man behind the mustache reminisces:

"The very first ad that I ever did for Pidilite was not even for Fevicol; the 'Dam laga ke haisha' campaign was originally created by me for Fevitite, which was another Pidilite brand. I created the radio ad for it and took it to Madhukarbhai, his father and the team. They thought it was a fantastic idea, and suggested that I make a film around the concept. When I presented the film, they loved it. That’s when Madhukarbhai’s father said to me, “Fevitite is too small a brand for a big idea like this. Take the money all over again and shoot it for Fevicol," and that was the beginning of everything."

Here's that Fevitite-turned-Fevicol ad:

May the magic continue!

Coke can, but will it?

A design concept titled COLORLESS by Harc Lee is being profusely applauded by netizens.

Here's the designer's take:

"A convex logo substitutes colorfully sprayed can. Naked can help to reduce air and water pollution occurred in its coloring process. It also reduces energy and effort to separate toxic color paint from aluminum in recycling process. Huge amount of energy and paint required to manufacture colored cans will be saved. Instead of toxic paint, manufacturers process aluminum with a pressing machine that indicates brand identity on surface."

Prima facie, it looks like a great idea. Besides the environment friendly angle that the can projects, it looks stunning too.

It'd be interesting to watch if Coke actually puts the design on the production line.

Hat Tip: TheDieline.com

Panicky brand, arbitrary arbitration?

The travel community portal oktatabyebye.com has been around for some time. In May 2009, Tata Sons Ltd filed a complaint with the World Intellectual Property Organization (WIPO) against the portal owners, contendng that the domain name infringes the right of its registered trademark/service mark TATA. WIPO is a specialised agency of the United Nations, established to promote the protection of IP throughout the world.

WIPO delivered its decision recently wherein it noted that the respondent had registered and is using the domain name (oktatabyebye.com) in bad faith; and ordered the domain name to be transferred to Tata Sons Limited.

This looks like a strange decision. "Ok Tata Bye Bye" is a colloquial phrase often used in our country to bid a jovial farewell. The portal has called for public support to preserve its rights over the domain.

Brand owners sometimes get unnecessarily jittery about their trademarks being misused. Brands are not just logos and trademarks. What you do as a company is also part of your branding.

Twice is not always nice

A year ago, I had posted about irritating repeats in cinema theatre advertising.

The same irritant has come to haunt online advertising as well. Very often, one sees the same banner repeated on the same webpage. I'm not sure whether any advertiser would like to burn away impressions like this. Mustn't the ad servers be more intelligent?

GreatNonStickPansSince1980: How's that for a brand name?

Businesses very often want their brand names to spell out their product/service. While it's not always a bad idea, getting fixated on this style of branding often leads us to very uninteresting names and sometimes even works at cross-purposes with the business.

A case in point is TinyURL.com. A website whose raison d'être is shortening URLs has a URL that is ELEVEN characters long!

If I shorten the link to this blog using TinyURL, I get http://tinyurl.com/lebj3y. If I use bit.ly, I get http://bit.ly/QyFOc. That's six characters saved. Now on platforms like Twitter where every character counts, it's not surprising that bit.ly scores over TinyURL.com.

On a slightly unrelated note, an NYT blogger cites some more reasons why bit.ly has found a haven at Twitter.

Good Carma

This Friday, my car stalled. The battery charger warning indicator came on when I started for work in the morning. I thought I would take it to the service station. I was running low on fuel, so I stopped by at a fuel station. After refuelling, the car just refused to start.

The guys at the Shell fuel station went out of their way to help me. They pushed the car to a safe corner at their station and assured me that they would look after the car while I called for help. They even invited me to their office while I awaited the mehanic.

They demonstrated that the best Marketing happens when you are not even marketing. It happens when you're helping your customer.

Thank you Shell.

The extra mile is where the WOWs are

In a recent post on Tompeters.com, author, speaker and consultant Steve Yastrow argued that in each customer interaction, one must aim to be "irreplaceable." The post sparked an insightful debate in the comments section (Yours truly couldn't resist to add in his two bits).

I think trying to be irreplaceble is good advice for people as well as brands. It's only when you try to walk the extra mile that you can deliver WOW experiences like the one narrated in this video:

Google gets lenient with keywords

BusinessWeek reports

Starting June 4, marketers in about 200 countries will be allowed to purchase rival trademarks as keywords to trigger display of "sponsored search" ads on Google. Honda, for instance, could bid to have one of its ads displayed when a consumer searches the term "Toyota." In recent years some companies have sued Google or the competing company, saying the practice is a form of trademark infringement.

India is on the list of regions for which Google will not investigate the use of trademarks as keywords. However, I'm not sure whether this will spell huge changes in the SEM scenario in our country. Many advertisers in India already use keywords that are rival trademarks to display their ads, as you can see in the example below:

Reputation is not built on fine print

Banking behemoth State Bank of India (SBI) is causing quite a stir in the home loan market with its 8% fixed rate product. New applicants are being offered home loans at 8% for a year.

Now SBI's ads are not exactly Cannes material (as you can see in the pic here) but one thing that stands out is the clarity with which the offer is presented without resorting to sneaky fine print. There is no attempt to hide the condition that the rate will be reset after a year.

When you've got a product like this, it's quite tempting to trumpet the big promise and shove the caveats under the carpet. Kudos to SBI for resisting the temptation. Being honest and upfront is key in Marcom, especially when you're looking to sign up customers for the long term. Is it a surprise then that SBI features among the world's 50 most reputed firms?

Maximum bang for the billboard

What message do you put up on a billboard above your storefront? Your toll-free no.? A clever line? Your web address?

NakedPizza--a pizza joint in New Orleans--thought different, reports TechCrunch.

Standing out has never been easier

Look around. Almost everybody is overpromising and underdelivering. The fine print mousetrap lurks in every corner. You have pricing designed to trick your brain (just Rs 799, for instance). Whenever customers are required to enter into long-term contracts, they almost always end up getting a raw deal after they sign up.

This is an unprecedented opportunity for brands that want to stand out.

Here's how:

• Tell great stories. And then go ahead and overdeliver.
  
• Do not make promises that come with strings attached.
  
• If you've made a promise, keep it.
  
• Keep existing customers happy. Word of mouth is more important than it ever was.
  
• Be transparent. Say no to trickery. Sometimes, it's too hard to resist the lure, but stand your ground.
  
• Appreciate the power of understatement. If you have a salience, live it. You may choose to convey it subtly but don't shout about it. An honest man who says "I'm honest" all the time is sure to invite some doubts. Positive inferences drawn by customers about your brand have much more impact than your headline or your punchline.
  

These can always help a brand win, but more so in today's environment.

I don't have an Inbox!

For 12 years, I've been logging into my Hotmail account almost every day. When I tried logging in this morning, I got this immensely friendly and helpful message thrown at me.

Give me a break. If you are making things inconvenient for me, at least tell me why you are doing it and help me tide over the inconvenience.

How would the old geeks at Redmond feel if they turned up for work one morning and found this message at their workstations:
You never worked here. If you need a job, go to Cupertino. The coffee there tastes the same.

Update (11 April, 2009): The incorrect message was caused by a networking issue, says the Windows Live team.

Seth Godin offers boring advice

Seth Godin urges Marketers to find a handful people (he actually says ten people) who trust, need, respect and listen to you.

A question we Marcom professionals need to ask ourselves is, "Do we have a communication strategy specifically for these few?"

Seth signs off by saying, "Three years from now, this advice will be so common as to be boring. Today, it's almost certainly the opposite of what you're doing."

Read Seth's post here.

Creative slowdown

Slowdown is surely taking its toll on creativity, among other things. After the funny Finnair ad that I recently wrote about, it's now the turn of Singapore Airlines to get absurdly literal.

Making your customer smile

A Southwest Airlines flight attendant has turned the safety announcement rigmarole into an entertaining performance. When a service makes the customer smile, the brand checks into a cosy room in the consumer's mind.

Hat tip: John O'Leary

It's a bird, it's a plane, it's a joke!

Started this morning with the best workout: a hearty laugh. This ad stared out of the newspaper. I stared back , and then laughed my lungs out.